Have you ever watched your favourite celebrity and wonder how they do it? How do they move gracefully and purposefully on stage, and how do they make performing or even just talking look so easy and natural?
That is self-confidence.
You and I both have it. But we need to build it to use it to impact ourselves and others positively.
The University of South Florida defines self-confidence as an attitude about your skills and abilities. It is knowing both your strength and weakness and having a positive view of yourself. This last statement – having a positive picture of yourself – rings the loudest for me. I believe that self-confidence is viewing yourself positively, despite all the flaws and weaknesses you may have. Having a positive self-image makes you feel assured of your judgment, decisions and allows you to take dynamic and empowering actions.
Why is it important? Self-confidence opens a lot of exciting facets in our lives. My mentor, Marisa Peer, says that confidence is the key to unlocking your goals!
As I've seen with my clients, if your confidence level is high, you exude positivity and are way more likely to be happy. Confident people live to be great leaders and influencers. They are flexible and resilient. It is not as if they don't meet obstacles in their path. They do, and they beat it with grace under pressure. Valuable is how they see themselves and because of this, climbing to the top is an exciting journey!
You may have also stumbled on the term self-esteem in the past. Because these two are often conflated, you may be wondering if they are synonymous. Self-esteem is quite different, but I believe that it helps with building your self-confidence. According to the Mayo Clinic, 'self-esteem is your overall opinion of yourself.'
When you have low self-esteem, you put little value on your thoughts and opinions. This might also affect how you see your abilities. For me, self-esteem is self-acceptance. It is how worthy you see yourself. No matter how other people see you or speak of you, know YOU ARE ENOUGH!
You always have been, and you always will be! 😊
Sometimes, our weaknesses hold us back. Just thinking about the things we cannot do or things we cannot control depletes us. Nonetheless, being aware of your strengths and weaknesses is an important first step in building your confidence. And doing something about it is the next great step. Yes, you must continually hone your strengths. I understand how easy and comfortable it is to stay in your comfort zone. But you also need to work on improving your weaknesses. You can do it by using what you can do best as a springboard to highlight what you cannot.
Do you know a timid person? Did you notice that these shy people remain quiet until the conversation topic shifts to something they are good at or that interests them? Then they begin to open up and forget their apprehensions for a moment.
You can do the same! Find connections between things you are good at and the things that you are not. Try doing these things together. Complement your mundane routine with challenging tasks. As Eleanor Roosevelt said, "Do one thing, every day, that scares you". Instead of asking, "what's the worst that can happen?" ask yourself, "what's the best that can happen?"
Try it! Go with the flow and as you turn your weaknesses into strengths, watch yourself blossom into a more confident, self-assured person.
As mentioned above, self-esteem is how we see our worth. It plays a role in our belief system, especially in ourselves. If I were to ask you to describe yourself in one word, what word would that be? Make it significant and powerful because that is a glimpse of your self-esteem.
Those who know me really well would be able to guess my word of choice that describes me … 'FABULOUS' lol 😊
I endeavour to live up to that identity.
What empowering label, belief, or identity do you want to be your dominant focus?
"I am not good enough." "I am not smart enough." "I am not capable enough." You may have been saying these to yourself without realizing it. You need to identify these limiting thought patterns and replace them with the opposite: good, positive, and empowering thought patterns. "I am not good enough" becomes "I am more than enough," "I am fabulous," “I am phenomenal.” Yes!
Choose positive and empowering words to describe yourself, and you are good to go!
You might be thinking this is a silly and childish idea, but it's not. You see, our brain is made up of 5% conscious mind and 95% subconscious mind. All our thoughts are downloaded into our subconscious mind, and these thoughts, whether good or bad, surface into our conscious mind during situations that seem suitable.
The good news is, we can control our thoughts!! If we start to think about ourselves positively and do it more often, then more positive, empowering thoughts are being dropped into our subconscious mind, making it available for use by our conscious mind when we need it. Indeed, this thought will give us a high and drive us to see ourselves in an even brighter light.
To learn more about releasing limiting beliefs, watch my video here>>>
In a way, self-confidence is a skill we need to develop. Honing a skill, we need to consistently work on it until it becomes part of who we are. Singers, dancers, athletes, and fitness gurus all commit a large chunk of their waking hours to enhance themselves in their respective areas. In building self-confidence, we can start by establishing small, consistent habits every day.
What are confident habits? These are feel-good activities you can include in your daily routine, which will help build your confidence in ways you cannot imagine.
Start by experimenting today:
Every morning and evening, make a point to visualize what you want to be and what you want in your life. For example, if you are an awkward speaker, imagine yourself to be an eloquent, charismatic and articulate keynote speaker standing in front of an audience, listening intently to you in awe.
Endorphins, or happy hormones, are naturally released in your body when you exercise. It boosts your mood and confidence. Exercise also relieves tension, making you feel more relaxed and centred.
You are what you eat, so eat a balanced diet to keep your body in tiptop shape. Fill up with antioxidants as well to achieve optimal cellular health.
No man is an island. Making meaningful connections with family and friends every day reduces stress and makes our hearts full.
We must have already drawn the line from confidence to productivity. Because if you view your abilities as excellent, then you must be a highly productive person. But did you know that it is inversely true as well? So yes, being productive is a sure way to the road of self-confidence. By making things happen day in and day out, you feel gratified and successful, leading to feelings of happiness, confidence, and satisfaction.
Give my powerful morning ritual a try and experience the beautiful effects of self-love.
Achieving a goal boosts your confidence more than anything.
The key is to write clear and compelling goals and make them SMART!
Compelling goals make you find a non-negotiable reason 'why' you need to reach them. This will serve as your drive to pursue them whatever it takes. You may meet hurdles after hurdles, but your strong 'why' will keep you going until it is reached.
On the other hand, SMART goals are specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and timely. Like in affirmation and visualization, SMART goals make your dreams more vivid, creating a clearer map for you to tread to achieve them.
Fix your eyes on 1 to 2 goals in every aspect of your life – family, friends, business, career, leisure.
As they say, dream big but start small. Act as if you are already living them. Feel them and speak of them as if they are happening already. Soon, it will be your reality!
Chicken Soup for the Soul’s originator, Jack Canfield, says that “When you cultivate gratitude, you’re able to feel true joy and contentment, no matter what you have or don’t have in your life.” Gratitude has well been established as a source of happiness. Being thankful for whatever comes your way also helps you to view things positively.
How do I practice Gratitude? Upon waking up, think about the wonderful things in your life – the people and pets that you love, the things you look forward to doing, the job you love, the healthy food you would be preparing – and whisper a prayer of thanks. Then, in the café, show your appreciation for the friend you met, the person who made your coffee, and even the stranger who opened the door for you. All through the day, search for people and things to appreciate. Then, at night, before sleeping, thank the day for the wonderful experiences, the small speed humps that challenged your problem-solving skills, and the people who helped you in one way or another. Do this every day.
As you build your confidence, it is essential to exercise an Attitude of Gratitude. Appreciating yourself and the things that come your way, instead of doubting or fearing them, helps you to deal with them better. Everything is a blessing, albeit some of them might be in disguise. Some will help you, and some will teach you. So, gear up, and face them head-on. 😊
My Gratitude and Success Journal is available on my website. It will help you exercise your gratitude muscle which will attract more positive experiences in your life.
With increased self-confidence, you are now ready to conquer the world!
Enjoy the journey; it is going to be phenomenal!
I have created the Gratitude & Success Journal to help you focus on every area of your life. Each chapter focuses on a different area of your life: Love, Career & Success, Happiness, Health & Wellness and Inspiration.
Each chapter provides the reader with a daily Gratitude Practice that includes:
If you feel your restlessness and unhelpful thoughts, emotions and habits are deeply rooted within you, please enjoy a consultation from Mind Motivation Coaching on Rapid Transformational Therapy (RTT).
RTT Therapy incorporates Neurolinguistic Programming, Psychotherapy, Cognitive Behavior Therapy, and Hypnotherapy to deliver fast results. Through hypnosis, RTT can access the mind's subconscious to discover and change or reprogram certain beliefs acquired through the years that stop one's growth and peace of mind.
RTT can be applied in different aspects of one's life like self-confidence, healing from past trauma, quitting addictions, stopping unhealthy behaviours, and counteracting stress, low self-esteem, and lack of confidence.
Are you ready to start your journey towards more CONFIDENCE, abundance, happiness, and success?
Create your dream life with Mind Motivation Coaching. Work with Myia from anywhere in the world via Zoom!
“Myia’s work is ROCKET FUEL for transforming clients!” - Patty Aubery,
President of The Canfield Training Group